ambivalence

I’ve always lamented on how vulnerable we are and how dreadful of the human condition to be entirely at the mercy of the environment. An unfortunate cut slicing deep into my skin while making dinner that is now a healing scar has always served as a reminder about the fragility of humankind. Although a minute scar now, I can remember distinctly the swift infliction of the knife, and how the blood gushed out of the 1cmx1cm v-shaped wedge, as if threatening to drain the life out of me. At that moment, I was even deluded into thinking that I was going to lose the portion of my flesh. And as I stared at my blood blending with the tap water, how I panicked and agonized over whether I’d need stitches or whether the wound would be infected if I didn’t get them; and to think that it didn’t even hurt.
Often while watching movie trailers, I catch myself commenting on how I dislike certain movies because they amplify our vulnerability (mostly slasher flicks and sci-fi ones that revolve around the extinction of mankind) and I hate to be reminded of this fact since I mull over it now and then.
The last time I found myself making such a comment, my sister shared her insight with me. But it’s rather strange for someone like her whose flavor in movies is of guns and violence to be saying this. “If we are not vulnerable at all, then we wouldn’t think that our lives are at the least precious” - which reminds me of another similar concept…if we’re never sick, we wouldn’t know what it’s like to be healthy…